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The life of a porn addicted housewife.

Monday, October 23, 2006

The Soft Soothing Sounds Of.....A Jackhammer??? 

For the last two weeks the county has had a crew out tearing up and replacing the curbs and driveways on my street.
For some reason I find the sound of them to be strangely calming.
First they chop everything up with a jackhammer, then they come through with a backhoe and scoop it all up and dump it in dump trucks, and finally they run the curb machine along the road. There is an amazing amount of crashing and banging going on out there. Lots of beep beep beeps when they are backing the machinery and trucks around. I am especially fond of the sound of the concrete trucks.
I know it all goes back to how much time I spent on construction sites in the past, but why do I find it so calming that I can actually fall asleep to the sound of them jackhammering out my driveway?
Call me strange if you like, but the sound of construction is music to my ears.
I will miss them when they are gone.

On another note; it’s already gotten cold enough outside that we had to pull down all of the storm windows. Brrrrr!!!! I’ve found that the warmest room in this house is actually the bathroom on the second floor. Guess I will have to put a reading chair in there!

Saturday, October 21, 2006

The Big Crash 

I haven’t written much lately because I know the whole painting thing has to be boring you to tears.
Well today, even though it involves painting, something happened that I just had to tell you!

I have moved on to the stairway from the kitchen down to the side door and then on down to the basement. I have already painted the ceilings, primed the walls, baseboards, doors, and doorframes, and taped everything off. Today I was cutting in the color and everything was going along smoothly, when BAM, I fell right down the stairs and landed in the basement!!!! People say accidents like that happen in slow motion, but that did not happen to me at all. One second I was on the top step and the next I was sitting on the basement floor in a puddle of yellow paint.
It scared the absolute crap out of me! It took me a few seconds to even move because I was afraid I had broken something. I moved around a bit until I was sure no bones were broken and I wasn’t bleeding. Then I realized that my head hurt like a bitch. I touched my forehead and found a lump the size of a golf ball. I was horrified! Evidentially I had whacked the hell out of my head on the hand rail.
I stood up and saw that I had yellow paint all over me which meant I couldn’t even go upstairs. Luckily I found a shirt by the washing machine so I was able to change into that. I found a roll of paper towels and wiped as much paint off of my pants as I could. I hobbled slowly up the stairs because my left calf was completely knotted up and stood in the kitchen for awhile trying to let some of the paint dry before I went upstairs to change.
I thought it over and decided that since I had a giant lump on my forehead I should call Ap0k to tell him what I did. I didn’t want to bother him with it at work, but I figured if he came home later and found out he would be livid. As soon as I told him he rushed right home to make sure I was still in one piece then he made me dinner. He is such a sweetheart! And to top it all off, he didn’t laugh at me until he knew for sure that I was alright.
So here I sit tonight, stiff as can be. My butt hurts like mad, my head is sore, my calf keeps knotting up, and I just found a bruise on my arm. I feel like a complete buffoon!

My advice to you………don’t try to paint while standing on wood stairs in socks and no shoes. You REALLY can slip and fall right on your butt. I’m guess I am just lucky I didn’t break anything.

Tuesday, October 10, 2006

2 Live Crew - Shake a lil Somethin'

This one is straight up for me, because no matter what anyone says, 2 Live Crew and Uncle Luke will ALWAYS be the shit!!!
DJ Laz - Journey Into Bass

This one is for AP0k, she'll be fixed soon and she'll be better than ever!!!
Whodini - Freaks come out at Night (original)

One of my absolute all time favorite songs. I still think my phone is ringing when I hear it on the radio!
2 Unlimited - No Limit DVD-Rip

Now THIS is a great song and a great video!!!!

Monday, October 09, 2006

Painting For Dummies (Like Me!) 

I thought I would pass along some things I have learned over the last month about painting 100 year old plaster walls.

1. Do not rely on the blue painters tape to keep your paint where you want it. No matter how hard you stick the tape down, the paint WILL leak under it. Yes I followed the rules about not painting up against it, but it bled under in every single room I have done so far. I have primed every room just as you should, but that has bled under the tape too. Maybe the tape works ok on newer drywall, but not plaster walls that are almost 100 years old. These walls laugh at blue tape!

2. No matter how much paint they say you will need plan on a minimum of twice as much. Old plaster walls, even those that are properly primed, will suck up your paint as fast as you can put it on. Red and orange tones are especially bad about this. Both my orange and red rooms took 4-5 coats of paint after being primed. The yellow gold and green all took two coats, and surprisingly the blue only took one coat.

3. Do not under any circumstances get high gloss paint on a flat paint! I can not stress this enough!!! I am painting the dressing room a deep red with high gloss white trim. Of course the gloss white leaked over onto the flat red and I am playing hell trying to cover it up. A flat paint will NOT cover a gloss without a minimum of 1000 coats. You think I am exaggerating, but trust me, this is a nightmare. On the other hand, one coat of gloss white WILL cover flat red. Red won’t cover white, but white will cover red? I don’t know about you, but to me this just seems to defy all laws of physics.

4. The line between the top of the walls and the ceilings, which are also plaster by the way, is not, has never been, and will never be straight. Learn to live with it or put up molding.

5. No matter how hard you try to keep paint off of the wood floors, even if you cover them with plastic, you WILL get paint on them. Do not try to wipe it up! Let it dry! If you try to wipe it up while it’s wet it smears and can get into the grain of the wood and into the spaces between the slats. Dried dots will pop right off with your fingernails, and larger spots will peel or wash off easily. Another tip, Clorox wipes work great for getting the dried paint off. Not only will you have a clean floor when you are done, it will also be disinfected.

6. Razorblades will become your best friends. Whether it’s cutting stuck tape off of a wall so that you don’t tear the paint, or it’s scraping paint off of things you never meant to get paint on, they will become indispensable.

7. You may think you are done with a room, but in a week you will find something you missed. Be it the inside of a closet left unpainted, paint on a baseboard, or a smudge of paint on the ceiling, you won’t see it right away. Usually you won’t see it until you move the furniture in so you have to work around it. Sometimes I think there is a ghost coming along behind me leaving a paint trail for me to clean up.

8. Even if you make a list, you will never make it home from the store with all of the things you will need. You will never have enough tape, you will always need at least one more roller, and all of your brushes will disappear. Be prepared to make runs to Home Depot on almost a daily basis. I even asked for, and received, Home Depot gift certificates for my birthday.

9. Don’t be afraid to try different colors! White/cream/beige walls are boring at best. Be brave and put some bright or deep colors on the wall. I am painting every room a completely different color and Ap0k and I joke that we are trying to turn the house into a box of crayons.

10. Don’t be afraid to change your mind mid-stream. It’s just paint and if you don’t like it you can always start over.

11. However much you think it will cost, budget more! However long you think it will take, be prepared for it to take longer.

12. Above all else, don’t be afraid to try. At first it will be overwhelming, but once you get into your groove things will go much more smoothly. You will swear a lot in the beginning, but that will soon turn to laughter, and the sense of satisfaction you will feel when you complete a room is well worth any effort you put into it.

(5 down.....10 to go!)

Monday, October 02, 2006

A WTF Suspension 

I am filing this under the “WTF???” heading.

Art Teacher Loses Job After Kids See Nude Sculpture

Children Were On School-Approved Field Trip

POSTED: 10:32 am EDT September 26, 2006
FRISCO, Texas -- An award-winning Texas art teacher who was reprimanded after one of her fifth-grade students saw a nude sculpture during a trip to a museum has lost her job.
The school board in Frisco has voted not to renew Sydney McGee's contract after 28 years. She has been on administrative leave.
The teacher took her students on an approved field trip to a Dallas museum, and now some parents are upset.
The Fisher Elementary School art teacher came under fire last April when she took 89 fifth-graders on a field trip to the Dallas Museum of Art. Parents raised concerns over the field trip after their children reported seeing a nude sculpture at the art museum.
The parents had signed permission slips allowing their children to take part in the field trip.
McGee's lawyer said the principal at Fisher Elementary School admonished her after a parent complained that a student had seen nude art.
McGee said the principal had urged her to take the students to the museum.
Now, McGee, who was honored with a Star Teacher Award two years ago, is on paid administrative leave until her contract with the school district expires in March.
Other parents are worried about the future of the art program at the school, which they cite as a reason for moving into the neighborhood.
"Our main concern right now is what's going to happen to the children and what's going to happen to the art program at Fisher Elementary. It is the best art program. That's the reason we moved to this neighborhood. It's because of the teachers," said Shannon Allen, a parent. "It was a principal-approved trip. What's the big deal?"
Officials with the Frisco school district declined to comment on the matter.


I don’t understand people like this. What is the problem? So some 5th graders saw a nude statue. I really doubt they will be scarred for life. I also doubt it will turn them into sexual deviants.
What these parents don’t seem to understand is that if they want to blame someone, they need to blame THEMSELVES. The children all had signed permission slips. It was up to the parents to know where they were sending their child.
What really aggravates me is that an award winning teacher was suspended just because some uptight stick-up-the-ass parents complained. And this after the principal encouraged the field trip. Ridiculous. Complete and utter bullshit. I am not one to encourage litigation, but if I were this teacher I would sue their asses off!

Here is a larger, more in depth, article:

http://www.nytimes.com/2006/09/30/education/30teacher.html?ex=1159848000&en=0adf54fecf9b630b&ei=5087%0A

THis article includes photos of the offending statues. You be the judge:

http://www.computernewbie.info/wheatdogg/2006/09/30/dallas-art-teacher-sacked-after-students-see-nude-boy-woman/