The life of a porn addicted housewife.
Thursday, June 30, 2005
It appears the after haloscan upgraded their servers a lot of people are having massive problems with their comments.
Mine are either showing or not (depends) in the post total count.
They may or may not show up in the comment box.
They may or may not show up on the manage comments page @ haloscan itself.
Also a bunch of my comments have changed dates for no apparent reason.
Supposedly they are working on the problems now.
Please feel free to leave comments as normal. I will be able to find them, it's just a matter of which page to look at.
He woke me up at 4:30 this morning and basically had his way with me. I am talking the good rough stuff too. No wimpy pseudo-sex either, this was full blown toss me around and make me beg for mercy sex. This was the kind of sex that takes everything you have in you just to stay on the bed. I have a feeling my hips are going to have fingerprint bruises. I grunted, gagged, and choked so much that when we were done I couldn’t even swallow. I think I may even have chewed a hole in the blanket at one point. Life is goooooood!!!
After that I staggered out and fixed his breakfast and his lunch (he’d earned it!)
Needless to say, by the time I was finished in the kitchen I was pooped. I had only slept 3 ½ hours before he woke me up. I sat down at my desk to check my forums and he called me in the room. I figured he needed help with something. Nope!
He tossed my ass on the bed and slammed me again!!! First this way, then that way. I have no need of a chiropractor today that’s for sure. I may need a wheelchair though because I am in the midst of a bad case of “wobbly-legs.”
This is the kind of sex I prefer. Rough and ugly. I need sweat. I need spit and drool. I need aches and pains. I guess you can count me as lucky because that is what he prefers too. Actually he holds back. If he was to go all out I would probably be unconscious by the time he finished.
So, even though it is just after 8am, I am going to bed.
Being married to a big old brute DOES have its advantages!!!!!!
Wednesday, June 29, 2005
I am EXTREMELY close to this person, but they have started treating me differently lately. The closeness we usually share is off kilter. The person still talks to me of course. It’s just the WAY they talk to me that is odd. The things we talk about have changed also.
Actually it seems that this person’s sense of humor has gone south. For the last few weeks the joking has almost ceased. They have even stopped making the faces that always make me laugh. The person is becoming more and more serious every day. They are not the same fun-loving person they were up until about a month ago.
I think what is upsetting me most is the lack of contact. Yes the person is there with me, but the contact is gone. It has gotten to the point where I am being rebuffed.
I wish I knew what was wrong. Did I do something?
Have I changed? Are this person’s feelings changing?
I am feeling shut out, and I don’t like it at all.
I can’t sit still. I can’t seem to concentrate on anything. I feel like I want to eat, but I’m not hungry. I have plenty of things I could be doing, but I’m bored anyway.
Nothing on TV is worth watching (not that there ever is.)
I have come to the conclusion that I am massively horny. Yep, the old stick-in-the-mud wants sex. It’s shocking I know. Normally I am like this at about 3am. I guess taking the St. John’s Wort has thrown my sex drive timetable out of whack.
Of course Ap0k is at work damnit! What am I going to do with myself until he gets home? Hmmmmm, this could get interesting!
Tuesday, June 28, 2005
I found out a short while back that Ap0k and I are going to be grandparents. It has taken me this long to say anything about it because I was completely floored. Am I happy about it? I am still not sure.
Most of you know that I am not a kid person at all. Babies and little kids drive me up the wall. I know that because my daughter has no money I am going to end up as day care. If I had wanted to take care of another baby I would have had another one of my own (perish the thought!) Yes, I know the whole “you give them back at the end of the day” thing, but what about the rest of the time? I don’t handle children well at all. Some people were born nurturers and some weren’t. Unfortunately I fall into the “weren’t” category.
Another thing that is bothering me is that because my daughter has no money I can see that this is going to be just another financial drain on Ap0k. There again, if we had wanted to pay for another child, we would have had one (gag!)
I am only 39 years old. I am not old enough to be called Grandma yet! Ap0k says the age thing doesn’t bother him, but he’s a guy. Here I am pushing 40 HARD and now I am going to be a grandma too? When does the grey hair start popping out?
What’s funny to me about the whole thing is that she waited until she was far enough along that now she has to have it before she told me. She knows for a fact that I would have tried to convince her not to have it. Personally I don’t think she’s ready to be a mother yet. It would have been nice if she had saved up a bit of money first.
Before anyone yells at me, yes I know I had her at the same age, but you know what? I wasn’t ready! It was hard both mentally and monetarily. I would have to say that hard doesn’t even scratch the surface of what we went through. I was hoping that because she knew the whole story of when we had her she would be a bit smarter than I was. I guess I was wrong. Why do young girls always think it is going to be so easy? I thought it was all going to be peaches and cream. In reality it was a big pile of crap! I wouldn’t wish what Ap0k and I had to go through on anyone.
I know I sound harsh, but I am just being realistic. If she’s happy, then yes I am happy for her. I know this is not going to go how she plans though.
I am terribly worried about a friend of mine. He is acting very strangely. He seems to be getting more and more depressed on a daily basis. He is saying things that are scaring me. I spoke to another friend about it last night and he has noticed the same things that I have. We don’t know what to say to this guy because he has become so closed up.
He seems to be hiding something from us. We have our suspicions on what it could be, but coming right out and asking him if that is the problem would just end up freaking him out I am sure. If what we think it is is actually the truth then I hope he knows that our feelings towards him would not change in the slightest.
It would be easier for me if I lived anywhere near this person. He lives a zillion miles away though. I have known him for several years. When I first met him he was a happy guy. He was always joking with everyone, talked up a storm, and generally seemed in good spirits most of the time. About two years ago he started to become a bit withdrawn. Now he has gotten to the point that I am scared for him. Some of the things he says are very morose.
We used to talk on a daily basis, but now he is hardly ever around. Just yesterday I read something that he wrote and it disturbed me greatly.
How do you help someone who is so far away?
Monday, June 27, 2005
Is there a certain body type you look for? Do you find different face shapes more appealing than others? Are you drawn to a particular hair color?
Everyone has different tastes for different things. Some like big butts with little boobs, while others like the exact opposite. Some people like stick thin girls, while others prefer very large girls. What one person finds totally sexy can turn another person completely off.
Take me for instance. I am drawn towards larger guys with dark hair and blue eyes. If a guy doesn’t weigh at least 75 pounds more than me I rarely give them a second look. I am not talking about fat guys either. I am a huge fan of muscles. To me a guy needs to look like he could pick up the refrigerator for you when you want to sweep under it. I am not a small woman and I prefer a guy who can pick me up and toss me around like I am a lightweight. The guy also has to be at least 5’11” minimum. I am 5’9” and I have to be able to look up into his face. Being so tall myself I like having a guy that makes me feel shorter. If a guy weighs less than about 240 pounds I have no real attraction to them at all. I also love the combination of dark hair (preferably brown) and blue/grey eyes. Blonde hair on a guy totally freaks me out for some reason. Definitely no red heads either! The only red head I ever dated was a complete and utter ass. He was so bad that he managed to turn me off of red heads for life! Also a guy’s hair must be cut very very short. Long hair on a guy looks ridiculous!
I am a sucker for size. Big arms, big chest, big thighs, big calves, and big butts are a must. Of course a big dick is a requirement too! I have no use for little weenies.
One of the main things I look at is a guys hands. I like rough manly hands. If a guy has soft hands that tends to tell me that he doesn’t do any manual type labor. What use is a guy if he doesn’t work with his hands?
I cannot stand the “metro-sexual” types. All I ask is that you wash and wear clean clothes. A guy who spends all his time primping and preening with lotions and potions is just silly in my opinion. Be a man! Wash with a bar of soap. Men don’t need all of the shower gels, powders, and perfumes. If I want to smell something flowery I will smell myself. If you insist on using some of these products at least stick with “guy smells” like Brut.
Of course there are other requirements, but they are not so much physical as mental. A guy MUST understand and know how to fix cars. For some reason, guys who don’t understand how a car works, or a guy who can’t even change his own oil piss me off beyond all reason. If you can’t rebuild an engine I probably have no use for you.
A guy must also be able to use and fix computers. I like a guy that can wake up in the middle of the night and fix my computer while he’s 2/3rds asleep. This one isn’t AS important anymore because I have learned to fix most computer problems myself.
I am sure that I have probably offended several men with this post. If I did, I apologize. It was not my intention to offend, only to inform. I am also sure that there are a lot of women who will disagree with what I have said. That was the point of this post. While I prefer large strong (smart) men, other women prefer the small wimpy types. I know that in reality I am a complete throwback when it comes to my tastes in guys. I want a man to be a man. I want a man that can control me without overpowering me. I want a man that can protect me from most anything. I want a man that makes me feel like a woman. I want a man that takes charge when circumstances warrant it. I want a man that can put his foot down when I act up too much. But I also want a man that knows where the line is, and never crosses it.
In the end, I guess I want my husband, because reading over what I have written I see that I have described him pretty much perfectly.
Saturday, June 25, 2005
Last night we went to Home Depot and bought a new Ryobi weed eater. We also got the edger and blower attachments to go along with it. Actually we ended up having to go to a second Home Depot to get the edger because apparently they are very popular and sell out as soon as they get them in.
Ap0k and I spent several hours working on the yard today. I mowed while he cut some limbs out of a tree. We used the new weed eater, which blows the old one away. We edged the yard which was a major task because it has never been properly done before.
We live on a corner so there is a lot of curb and the grass had made it all the way out to the street. Shameful!
It looks amazingly good now.
Why do I always feel such a sense of accomplishment when the yard is finished? Is that silly?
We really REALLY need to paint the house. It is looking so sad right now. I would need to pressure wash it first because the sun has dried the paint out so badly that it is turning to dust. What color should it be? It is an awful beige now and I want to get totally away from that.
Now that you see how much the yard means to me, what is your guess?
Do I have no life or am I getting old?
Or maybe I just like a pretty yard?
Friday, June 24, 2005
So all you guys and girls out there, start saving up your pennies now because I have made a list of 19 things I must have or I will die.
OK, only some of them are on the MUST HAVE list, the rest are on the would like to have list.
You will be pleased to note that I am a cheap person. Not one thing on my list is over $30. In fact a lot of them are under $15.
You can see my list HERE.
I expect those presents to start rolling in soon!
Thursday, June 23, 2005
“I Thank You” was released by ZZ Top on the album ”Deguello” in 1979.
The song, originally written by Isaac Hayes, is probably my favorite song by the group.
Billy Gibbons, Dusty Hill and Frank Beard have been together for what seems to be forever. They became a group in 1970 when I was only 5 so I guess that is why I feel like they have always been around. They released their first album ”ZZ Top’s First Album” that same year.
Since then they have only released 15 albums of original material which for a band that has been together for 35 years is pretty amazing. Of course there have been the obligatory “best of’s” and box sets too.
On June 2nd of this year ZZ Top embarked on their “Whack Attack” tour of North America, which at this time is scheduled to run through October.
One of the most interesting things about ZZ Top, to me at least, is the amazing collection of cars that Billy Gibbons owns:
This is without a doubt the most famous of Billy Gibbons’ cars. Her name is Eliminator and is a 1934 Ford 3-Window Coupe. She was the cover model for the album “Eliminator” and was featured in several of the videos from the album also.
My favorite of Billy’s cars has to be this one! CadZZilla is a totally “rethought” 1948 Cadillac. She was designed by Billy Gibbons and Larry Erickson and was built by Boyd Coddington.
Knowing my mother’s tastes I would guess that this one would suit her to a T. She is Kopperhed. A 1950 Ford that is simply outstanding. There are not a lot of pictures of this car available online. This one shows Billy driving her down the road.
Most of Billy Gibbons’ cars are too old to suit Ap0k, but I know for a FACT that he would drive Slampala! Supposedly this is Billy’s daily driver.
Now we come to HogZZilla. While I am not normally too big a fan of motorcycles I have to admit that this 1991 Harley Davidson is pretty dang awesome. The way they matched the tails on HogZZilla and CadZZilla is cool as heck.
There are others too but I can’t find pictures of them to save my life. If anyone knows where I can find a picture of Pearl Necklace I would greatly appreciate if you could send me a note.
Again, thanks for your continued visits. I hope that you enjoy some of the odd stuff I write about. I have been told that I have no clear train of thought on this site, but what you see here is exactly how my brain works. Pretty scary thought huh?
I wanted to take this as an opportunity to thank all of you for your continued support.
Wednesday, June 22, 2005
His whole Oedipus Complex theory is, to me at least, one of the silliest things I have ever heard of. This theory states that most, if not all, children (especially boys) have at one point or another wanted to have sex with their opposite sex parent. I don’t know about you, but I can honestly say that that particular thought has NEVER crossed my mind.
Freud also had some strange views on sex and masturbation in general. He felt that giving in to sexual desires, including masturbation, meant that your unconscious mind had triumphed over your conscious mind. I would have that that sexual desires WERE conscious thoughts? On that one I admit I could be wrong.
One of the more bizarre theories that Freud thought up was the Sadistic-Anal phase of psychosexual development. This theory states that a child’s pleasure in defecation is a result of wanting to create something of his own.
I know that a lot of Freud’s theories do hold water. I will not argue that fact. But if you take just this one quote from Freud, “psychology too is unable to solve the riddle of feminity”, you will see that the man really had no clue as to what was going on in the heads of his patients. In fact he had a theory that most women want to cut their husbands penises off. Penis envy at it’s finest!
I was reading up on some things last night and I came across the most bizarre thing I have ever read. At first I thought it was a joke, so I did more research. Turns out that it was true……
Vagina Dentata (toothed vagina) was a fear that Freud said many men suffer from. Not only teeth, but weapons hidden in the vagina make men fear that their penises will be devoured. At first I was dumb-struck. What kind of man would think of such a thing? Why would they think a vagina could castrate them? After reading more I found out that this has been a common myth throughout history from many parts of the world. During the Viet Nam War there was an urban legend type rumor going around that prostitutes had razors hidden in their vaginas. Men, let me just tell you this, that would not work! If a girl carried a razor in her vagina and took even one step, she would cut herself to shreds!
As for the whole teeth part of the theory, I found out that a woman CAN get toothlike substances in her vagina!! A buildup of dermoid cysts can form on the outer layers of embryonic skin cells. These buildups are able to mature into bone, teeth, or hair. YIKES!
This can happen anywhere that the skin folds in to become another organ such as the ear or the vagina. Well I think that is just too freaky!!! Of course this only happens in the rarest of circumstances, but still, isn’t that an awful thought. So I guess on that theory Freud may have been on to something. Though I have never met a man who thought a vagina would eat his penis.
So all you guys out there who think that vaginas are evil and that women want to bite your penises off……you just might be right!!!
Tuesday, June 21, 2005
What do you do when someone tells you something and then swears you to secrecy? What would you do if the person you are not supposed to tell is your spouse?
I was told a secret by someone the other day. I was told not to tell my husband specifically. Ap0k and I never keep secrets from each other! I hate it when I get put into that position. I spent all day yesterday flip-flopping between being mad and being sick to my stomach. If the secret had been something small then I probably would have been able to handle it better. Unfortunately this was something huge. When I say huge, I mean HUGE!
I will admit that when this person told me their secret I lost my marbles. I don’t think I handled the situation very well at all. What was really bad was that the more I thought about it, the more upset I got. I ranted and raved a bit. I didn’t yell or anything, but the person knew I was not thrilled in the slightest. I felt bad and apologized for getting upset. The person understood I think (I hope!) I will be talking to them shortly so I will find out then.
What I was really afraid of is that Ap0k would know what was up the minute he walked into the house last night. You need to understand that, as silly as it sounds, Ap0k really can read my mind. He is really freaky-good at it. He tends to know what I am thinking even before I do! In fact I am not the only one he can do this too. There are a couple other people that he can read with no problem at all.
After much soul searching I decided to tell him the secret even though I wasn’t supposed to. I was terrified that he was going to be livid. This was the type of secret I figured would send him over the edge.
Well you know what? After all of the crap I put myself through; stomach ache, headache, etc, do you know what he said when I told him?
“I knew that about a month and a half ago.”
I’ll be damned! I shouldn’t be surprised though. He’s a freakin’ Jedi for goodness sake. How does he always know things before anyone else does? He does that all the time.
Monday, June 20, 2005
Saturday, June 18, 2005
I waited until almost 4:30pm to start hoping that it had cooled off a bit. Boy was I mistaken! I wanted to wait for another day, but for some reason the grass doesn’t stop growing when I ask it to. In fact I wonder if it gets offended and grows even faster?
It ended up taking me quite awhile to get it finished because half-way though I had to take a break. I came in and sat in the air conditioning for about 15 minutes until I felt like wasn't going to die anymore.
In the end, by the time I was done I was a dirty filthy mess. In all honesty though, I did feel pretty good. Sometimes I just have to be outside regardless of the weather.
Bit by bit the grass is starting to take over the driveway so in the morning I am going to go out and dig out the edges again. If I am feeling real ambitious I may try to do the gutters too.
This weekend should be fun-filled! I am going to do more yard work; Ap0k is going to change his tires and radiator. Tomorrow is my mother’s birthday so I am sure we will end up going out to dinner with my family. As for Sunday, we will probably just hang around like normal. And yes, the “fun-filled” WAS sarcasm.
Friday, June 17, 2005
While the phrase “You do the crime, you do the time” may seem trite and outdated to some of you, I feel it is still one of the best statements out there.
Here in the Tampa Bay area there is a big controversy going on over sexual offenders and/or predators being allowed in hurricane shelters.
Hillsborough County Sheriff David Gee is trying to pass a Policy that will bar these criminals from being allowed into public storm shelters. I support this move 100%. Advocacy groups are saying that this violates the criminal’s rights, but I call BULLSHIT on that. I think that if you have committed a sexual crime then you should have ALL of your rights removed.
In my opinion, anyone convicted of a sexual crime, should be shot. I don’t care if the crime was committed against an adult or a child, I say shoot them on the spot. Sexual criminals cannot be “cured” because these crimes are a reaction to a sexual thought.
If a sexual criminal were to show up at a storm shelter that I was running, I wouldn’t care if there was a category 5 hurricane raging outside. I would not let them in. They can blow away with the rest of the trash out there as far as I’m concerned.
Should we shelter them in the jails? Well first off, that is where they should be anyway, but due to faulty laws regarding sex crimes these “people” are out walking the streets. We can’t be opening the jails to anyone during an emergency situation. That is how things go wrong.
While I do support this new policy with every fiber of my being, I can see where it is going to be tough to implement. When shelters are staffed by volunteers it will be next to impossible to keep these criminals out. Some have said that we could distribute pictures of the criminals to all of the shelters, but with over 1,300 convicted sexual predators and offenders in Hillsborough County alone it will be difficult at best for the shelter volunteers to match faces and pictures in an emergency situation.
It is a good plan, but it needs some serious thought in how to get it to actually work.
Now we move on to prison overcrowding.
I am sick to death of prisoner advocacy groups complaining about prison overcrowding, prisoner’s rights, etc etc.
If you did something stupid enough to land you in prison I don’t care if you are uncomfortable! In fact, if it were up to me, prisons wouldn’t have heat or air conditioning. I would feed you the bear minimum to keep you alive. Why should the general population of law abiding citizens have to pay for you to be comfortable? There are so many people in the U.S. that go to work every day and still can’t feed their own children. THOSE are the people that need our help, not criminals! Why should we stock your libraries when the public libraries are suffering? Trust me, if you murdered someone, I really don’t care about your feelings.
White Collar Crimes?
If someone embezzled money, forged checks, or screwed with the stock market, I would bet that sending them to a REAL prison instead of a country club would changed their ways. The country club prisons have to stop. When Martha Stewart was sent to “prison” she participated in (and lost) a CRAFT COMPETITION!!!!! Now that to me is totally ridiculous. What message is this sending to white collar criminals? If I get caught I will have to go stay at the hotel. Oh Boo-Hoo! If Martha had been sent to a real prison I bet she wouldn’t have looked so relaxed and refreshed when they let her out.
Prostitution should be legalized.
Who does prostitution hurt besides the prostitute themselves and the “john” that picks them up? Yes underage prostitution should be banned, but arresting the underage girls and letting them right back out to do it again is not helping them at all.
Prostitutes who are 18 or over though should just be left alone. Yes they may be hurting the “john’s” spouse, but that is a personal issue and does not affect me.
Marijuana should be legalized.
Even though I have not smoked it in 20 years, I still think marijuana should be legalized. It’s not the evil drug that some people say it is. In fact, how many of those people drink alcohol? Alcohol is a much worse drug than marijuana ever could be. But of course politicians drink, so that will never change.
As for those who want to ban medical usage of marijuana I have one question to as them. “Are you mad???” Why would you want to deny someone who is in pain the only drug that will help them? Selfish bastards!
Where you convicted of a murder?
If you are convicted of a murder then you should shot. No, I take that back. You should be chained to a tree and the family of the victim should be allowed full access to do whatever they wish to you.
If you are convicted of robbing someone I think you should have to not only pay the person back immediately, but you should also have to give up some of your possessions totaling the amount of the property you stole. This property should go to charity. It will teach you what it feels like to loose your stuff. You have no money and can’t pay it back you say? Well then you should have to get a job and have your check handed over to your victim. You don’t show up to work, your ass goes back to jail where it should be anyway!
The above thoughts are just a small representation of why I would make a lousy politician. I would try to pass laws that would never pass because too many people are overly worried about criminal’s human rights.
If the misguided prisoner advocates would focus their energies on more worthy causes such as children’s rights then maybe the world would be a better place.
Instead of worrying if a prisoner is comfortable, shouldn’t we be worrying if a child is safe?
Thursday, June 16, 2005
I can’t sleep to save my life anymore. As soon as I fall asleep, BOOM, I’m awake again. The tiniest little noise will wake me up. I do mean tiny too. One of the kittens can sneeze in the kitchen and I will wake up. The air conditioner comes on or off and I wake up. Then of course it seems I can go all day and not have to pee, but the minute I fall asleep I have to pee every five minutes.
It doesn’t help that Ap0k tends to sweat when he sleeps. Sometimes I have to totally uncover to let the heat escape. Of course I sweat now and then too, but usually only when I don’t feel well.
I’ve tried all of the tricks that people recommend like making the room as dark as possible, making the bedroom a “sleep-only” room (except for sex of course!), not taking naps, etc, etc.
The problem with the no-nap rule is that since I don’t get any sleep at night I am miserable during the day. So of course I lay down to take a nap which never lasts very long.
Another problem I have a lot of times is that the minute I fall asleep someone either calls on the phone or comes over to the house. The phone I can ignore by turning it to vibrate, but how do you ignore someone knocking on the door? I figure I’m awake now anyway, might as well let them in.
Some people say that I must be stressed about something, but really I am not. This sleep problem has been going on for years. I can’t think of one thing I would have been stressed about for that long. Except for maybe being stressed over the lack of sleep. Now THERE is a thought!
Maybe once a week I sleep all night long. The next day I feel FABULOUS, but then night rolls around and there I am, wide awake again. It gets very annoying to say the least. Ap0k doesn’t understand it at all. I think he has an off switch on the back of his head that flips the minute he hits the pillow. That is so unfair!
Tuesday, June 14, 2005
X = have done (My remarks are in brackets in purple)
(x) snuck out of the house [Countless times when I was a teenager.]
( ) gotten lost in your city
(x) seen a shooting star [I think more people have than we realize probably]
( ) been to any other countries besides Canada
( ) had a serious surgery
(/) gone out in public naked [I gave this a half of an X because I have been in public topless]
( ) kissed a stranger
(x) hugged a stranger [Once while going to my parents house we saw a pickup truck roll over. The car behind him was driven by his girlfriend. I hugged her because she was so scared. The pickup truck driver was ok, but badly shaken.]
(x) been in a fist fight [Several times in the past. One even led to me getting stitches.]
(x ) been arrested [Once, but that was another lifetime ago.]
( ) laughed and had milk/coke come out of your nose
(x) pushed all the buttons on an elevator [Hasn’t everyone?]
(x) swore at your parents [I swore at my mother ONCE. I was about 12 and I called her a bitch. She smacked me upside the head so hard that I bounced off the refridgerator and ended up with two black eyes. Go Mom!]
(xx) been in love [Only with my husband]
(x) been close to love [When I met my husband]
(x) been to a casino [I walked through the Seminole Casino here in town once.]
( ) been skydiving
(/) skinny dipped [Again I give this half an X because I have been to a topless beach.]
(x) skipped school [When I was in middle school several of us would skip. We would go to Dairy Queen and to the library. Oh what rebels we were!]
(x) seen a therapist [I saw a therapist for a short time after my uncle drowned. He was only 6 months older than me and was my best friend.]
(x) done the splits [I was a cheerleader in school. Ewwwwww!]
( ) played spin the bottle
(x) gotten stitches [Three times. Once by my eyebrow after I fell at hit my head on the corner of a table. Once after getting in a fight. Once after breaking a glass while washing dishes.]
( ) drank a whole gallon of milk in one hour
(x) bitten someone [Only during sex.]
( ) been to Niagara Falls
(x) gotten the chicken pox [When I was little, and I thought I was going to die.]
(x) kissed a member of the opposite sex [Of course.]
( ) crashed into a friend's car
( ) been to Japan
(x) ridden in a taxi [When I was little if the weather was bad my mom would load us in a taxi to go to the library. Since I have been in Florida I have ridden in a taxi only once. They are WAY too expensive.]
( ) been dumped
(x) shoplifted [Hey, I was young and we had no money!]
( ) been fired
(x) had a crush on someone of the same sex [My girlie crush is Rachael Ray, the girl on the Food Network.]
( ) had feelings for someone who didn't have them back
( ) gone on a blind date
(x) lied to a friend [Sometimes lies are nicer than the truth.]
(x ) had a crush on a teacher [My 6th grade teacher and my 9th grade science teacher.]
( ) celebrated Mardi-Gras in new Orleans
( ) been to Europe
( ) slept with a co-worker
(x) been married [Am married now. Have been for almost 20 years.]
( ) gotten divorced
(x) had children [Yes, and they keep coming back like boomerangs!]
( ) seen someone die
( ) had a close friend die
( ) been to Africa
(x) driven over 400 miles in one day [When I was doing floor flatness testing I had to drive to Jacksonville and back several times a week. Also had to drive to Miami and back in a driving rainstorm.]
( ) been to Mexico
( ) been to India
(x) been on a plane [Several times. I love to fly.]
(x) seen the Rocky Horror Picture Show [Have seen it in the theater with people all dressed up as the characters. They were squirting water and throwing toast. It was hysterical. I also have the DVD.]
( ) thrown up in a bar
( ) purposely set a part of myself on fire
(x) eaten sushi [We go out for sushi quite often. It’s a favorite of both of us.]
( ) been skiing/snowboarding
( ) met someone in person from the internet
( ) lost a child
( ) gone to college/university
( ) graduated college/university
(x) fired a gun [I lived in the middle of the woods once. Having a rifle was a prerequisite.]
(x) purposely hurt yourself [Carved someones initial into my hand once. That hurt, and was stupid to boot!]
(x) taken painkillers [When I got concrete poisoning of all things.]
(x) been intimate with someone of the same gender [A long time ago, before I met my husband.]
Monday, June 13, 2005
For those of you who may be new, you may not know that I spent many years as a construction inspector on small to very large new projects. It may sound like an odd job for a woman, but actually the number of female inspectors is growing rapidly. I have worked on projects as small as a house, as large as an NFL stadium, and everything in between.
The reason I don’t do this anymore is due to a couple things which I will try to describe in a reasonable manner.
In the past companies that supplied construction testing and inspection worked mainly for the owners of the projects. The inspectors had final say-so over most everything. This was true even when I first started in this field around 1994. Over the years it gradually changed to where now most inspection companies work for the contractors instead of the owners. This diminished the inspector’s power to correct problems dramatically. Because of this, the engineers who oversee and sign-off on an inspectors work were also pretty much brought to their knees. It was very discouraging to me to know for a fact that there were structural flaws in a building and to not be able to do anything about it. I worked for the same company two different times. At the end of approx. 7 years I began to feel like my job had little or no real meaning. I took 18 months off before going back, hoping that things had changed for the better. Unfortunately they had not. As long as the contractors are the clients there is no real way to perform an inspector’s job correctly. Yes, there are some clients who are the actual owners, but those are few and far between.
The problems with contractors being the client can be overwhelming. For instance, several years ago there was one contractor (who will remain nameless of course!) who was notorious for placing his hurricane clips properly, then removing them after the county inspector has signed off on them. I saw him do this more than once. I told my department manager who said there was nothing he could do about it because the county inspector had already okayed it. I was also told that if I wanted to keep my job I would not contact the county about it because our corporate office frowned on things like that. Where this was true or not I have no idea. I just went with what my manager told me. Of course hindsight is 20/20 and I wish I HAD said something!
In some cases I was not an inspector on a particular job. Sometimes I performed materials testing instead. Materials testing includes concrete testing, density testing, etc. In most cases the materials testing and the visual inspection are performed by two separate companies to avoid conflicts and to “spread the wealth.” While doing materials testing I saw many instances of contractors placing garbage in walls to take up space so that they would need less grout. Again, there was nothing I could do about this. As a structural inspector I saw contractors place garbage including construction material in the ground to save on backfill material. Recently we were told to write things like this down in our reports so we had a record of them. In the past we were told to ignore them completely.
Once you have been an inspector it is very difficult to go back to doing strictly materials testing. When you see something that is obviously wrong and you try to point it out to either the contractor or the actual inspector you are told to mind your own business. I have literally had nightmares over things like that. Schools falling down, buildings collapsing, things like that do not make for a good night’s sleep!
Until Florida’s building codes are strengthened, and owners become the clients more often, I really don’t see any of this changing. And that is sad.
Even though nothing exciting happens anymore, I am much happier just being a housewife. I guess in the end I just wasn’t cut out for the politics involved in construction.
Sunday, June 12, 2005
I have to just shake my head and laugh because after two weeks of daily torrential rains we get a couple light showers during a tropical storm. How funny is that?
Don’t get me wrong, I am NOT complaining!
What makes internet “friends” disappear? When you have spoken to someone on almost a daily basis for a few years don’t they realize how it makes you feel when they disappear with no explanation? Am I the only one that can’t just toss people aside like that? I am part of a group that has been together for many many years. Last year we lost two of the people out of nowhere. No explanation was ever given. A couple of months ago another guy left our group. Again there was no real explanation given. I know he is still “around” though because he still updates his blog quite often. When he first left he would still leave me comments here now and then. Now he doesn’t even do that. It’s kind of hurtful when I see him leave replies to other people. If I had done something to him I could understand, but as far as I know none of us ever did anything remotely wrong.
Not one of us took these friendships lightly. We felt about these people the same way we would feel about someone we spoke to face-to-face. We felt almost like these people were extended family. Unfortunately they apparently didn’t feel the same way about us. Live and learn I guess. You never know what people will do.
If you are one of the guys I am talking about, we miss you. I hope you know that when you left you took a piece of our hearts with you.
I am sure most of you will see this as silly, but hey, at least I am a heartfelt silly person.
Friday, June 10, 2005
With all of the rain we have had (every day for 2 weeks!) and the fact that we are starting to get the first effects of Tropical Storm Arlene, I decided that it was time to post the all time great song “It’s Raining Men”.
“It’s Raining Men” was released by The Weather Girls in 1983 on their debut (as the Weather Girls) album Success.
The song reached # 46 on the Pop charts, #1 on the Hot Dance Club charts, and # 2 on the British charts.
The Weather girls, Martha Wash and Izora Rhodes, began their career in the gospel group NOW. They then went on to be backup singers for Sylvester. Deciding to go their own way they named themselves Two Tons Of Fun and released two albums “Two Tons Of Fun” and “Backatcha.”
In 1982 the duo moved to the Columbia label and renamed themselves The Weather Girls. They released three albums with Columbia and then decided to split up and work separately.
Martha Wash went on to do session singing with various groups. She sang the uncredited lead on “You’re My One And Only (True Love)” by Seduction, “Everybody, Everybody” by Black Box, and most famously “Gonna Make You Sweat (Everybody Dance Now)” by C & C Music Factory. Sadly because Wash was so heavy she was replaced in pictures and videos by lip syncing dancers. She ended up having to sue the record company to get her share of earned royalties.
Izora Rhodes ended up moving to Germany and reformed The Weather Girls with her daughter Dynell.
Izora passed away in September of 2004 due to heart failure.
Currently Martha Wash is recording and touring.
Her song “You Lift Me Up” reached the top 5 on Billboards Dance charts in February of this year. She is known as The Queen Of Clubland by many in the gay community.
Martha also owns and runs her own record label, Purple Rose Records, and heads her own production company called Do-Kwa Productions.
You can visit Martha Wash’s official website HERE
Thursday, June 09, 2005
The Discovery Channel is holding a POLL to see what the American public thinks. You can vote by phone, text, or online. The results will be shown on Sunday June 19th at 9:00 pm EST.
At this time the poll is down to 25 people. From the 25 people listed, who would you choose? Would you choose someone else entirely?
Ap0k and I talked this over several times before we finally selected our choice. Actually there were only two people that we ever seriously considered.
They were Bill Gates and Muhammad Ali.
Bill Gates has done a lot not only for America, but for the whole world too. Among his accomplishments are; co-founding Microsoft with Paul Allen, developed BASIC with Paul Allen, developed MS-DOS, along with wife Melinda created a foundation that has donated many Billions of dollars to worthy causes too numerous to mention.
Muhammad Ali is best known as one of the world’s greatest boxers. He also went through a very bad time with the US government in 1967 when he refused his induction into the US Army stating that he was a conscientious objector and that his religious beliefs forbid him to fight in a war. Because of this he lost his boxing license and was stripped of his World Heavyweight title. Found guilty of violating the Selective Service Act he was sentenced to 5 years in prison. After a long court battle the Supreme Court eventually overturned the ruling. Through the whole ordeal Ali never wavered in his beliefs though he had lost his title and most, if not all, of his money. He was fighting not only for himself, but also for others who felt the Viet Nam War was unjust. After his conviction was overturned he was given his boxing license back and eventually regained the World Heavyweight title.
Since retiring from boxing, Ali has campaigned for several Democratic candidates, and has been involved in many political causes involving children and poverty.
In the end we chose Muhammad Ali.
Bill Gates is a very smart and generous man, but Muhammad Ali’s acts during the Viet Nam War empowered other people to stand up for both their beliefs and their rights.
Did you notice that Elvis is in the top 25? I find this almost offensive. The man was a great entertainer yes, but that was pretty much all he was. An entertainer who died of a drug overdose. Not so great in my opinion, though I am sure he will get a ton of votes.
Henry Ford and the Wright Brothers are good candidates. Without them we could still be traveling by horse and buggy.
Einstein and Edison are worthy.
No way I would vote for Oprah. I can't stand anything about her.
Who would you pick?
Wednesday, June 08, 2005
No seriously, I did.
I smartened up and instead of waiting until the afternoon to mow the lawn I actually got up and did it this morning. I think that Mother Nature has been trying to get me out of bed and out of the house in the mornings. The weather this morning, while a bit humid, was absolutely fabulous. I got the grass cut, the weed eating done, and the carport and the porch cleaned. I even cleaned the underside of the lawnmower out before I locked it up in the shed. By the time I was finished with the yard I was a dirty sweaty mess, but I felt great. Everyone needs to get out and get a good sweat going now and then.
The best part was that it was only 9:30am when I got done.
This afternoon it rained like heck again. After it cleared up I went outside and this is what I saw right in front of my house:
This is the biggest perfect rainbow I have ever seen. The fact that it is a double rainbow is amazing. As you can see it was so big that I couldn’t get it all in one picture. A bit more editing and I probably could have gotten rid of the strip in the middle where I joined it, but I was trying to show the immensity of it.
I want to say thank you to Mother Nature for the message. I understand now.
Tuesday, June 07, 2005
I have been trying to mow my lawn for the past 2 hours.
Initially it was bright and sunny, almost too hot to mow actually. I got dressed in my yard clothes and wouldn’t you know it, WHOOSH, it started to pour. I changed back into my house clothes and the rain stopped. That went on for over an hour.
Finally I got my clothes on, ran outside and BANG, thunder and lightning in what seemed to be my front yard.
Standing on the carport I can see rain all around me, but no rain in my yard. If I try to leave the carport there comes the lightning.
As the classic Chiffon commercial says, ”It’s Not Nice To Fool Mother Nature!”.
I want to make a public apology to you Mother Nature. I did not mean to offend you in any way!
This got me to wondering how sex was actually used in propaganda during the various wars.
Of course everyone knows what propaganda is. But how many of you have heard of Black Propaganda?
White Propaganda is from a documented source.
Grey Propaganda is from an unknown source.
Black Propaganda purports to be from one side, but is actually from the other side. It is used mainly to embarrass or misrepresent the enemy. Documents are altered or made up entirely.
Black propaganda was used during World War I of course, but during World War II it turned to pornography.
Mostly in leaflet form, this type of propaganda was meant to break a soldier’s hearts and morale.
Some of it started out pretty harmless actually. “'German soldier! Who is screwing your wife or buggering your son at home while you shiver at the front?” was used by the English Government. Of course it didn’t stop there.
One German leaflet shows an American woman having a sexual encounter with a dog.
The text reads:
"The woman alone without a man tries to get her pleasure any way she can. Her clitoris itches and burns like fire, and the dog's tongue performs miracles!"
Well you pretty much can’t get any raunchier than that!
Most of the leaflets depicted the “enemy” having sex with girls from the target country, or “girls from home” having sex with non-soldiers.
Sexually explicit Black Propaganda has been used during all major wars since WWII. Some people, such as the Viet Cong, did not use figures of naked women in their leaflets, but they did use references to sex.
Did the US use Black Propaganda? Not “officially” of course because we have restrictions on that sort of thing. Unofficially though there have been leaflets found, though they are few, that apparently did come from the US.
While this form of propaganda is meant to be a morale breaker, it has almost the opposite effect. Soldiers from all countries have always collected and traded the leaflets like baseball cards.
If you would like to read more on this subject, or you would like to see some very good examples of the leaflets themselves, then you will want to visit This Page. It is chock full of information and pictures.
I for one have found this to be a pretty fascinating subject.
Monday, June 06, 2005
Ap0k and I are of the same mindset. Life should be lived for today, not for tomorrow.
If there is something you want to do, then you should get out there and do it! If there is something you want to buy, save the money and go buy it!
Ap0k has a passion for his car. Some people can’t understand why he spends so much time, money, and energy on it. Of course these are the same people that buy cars they don’t want only because they are cheaper than the ones they really do want. If it makes him happy to work on his car, who am I to tell him he can’t?
I always want the latest and greatest computer crap. I want it to go FASTER! I want it to be BETTER! And I want it NOW! Never once has Ap0k told me I couldn’t have something. Speaking of which, I need to go get a new monitor for this computer. This one is getting some odd bends in it.
Most people would probably think we are crazy because we aren’t anal about saving money. Yes, we have a 401K, but that’s about it. I don’t want to be one of those people who make themselves miserable for what may or may not be their future. Why should you spend the best years of your life going without? No, I don’t think that the minute I turn 60 I will start to fall apart, but why spend 45 years driving yourself crazy worrying? Too many people work their life away and go without so that they can “save for their future” only to keel over and die right after they retire. I am sure their kids appreciate it though. My philosophy is to have a set amount of money in the bank that you never touch for emergencies, make sure the company you work for has good insurance, never overextend your credit, and pay your bills on time.
We very rarely make plans anymore because it seems that every time we do someone else throws a monkey wrench in them. After years of messed up plans we have pretty much came to the unspoken agreement that plans suck. I will say though that on the rare occasion we do make a plan to do something I never tell anyone else. If anyone in my family even gets an inkling that we have plans they will find some way to blow them out of the water.
Remember the surprise trip to Chicago that Ap0k took me on last month? That’s how life should be lived. Spontaneity can be a scary but wonderful thing. When you think about it, life itself is based on spontaneity. Do we plan to meet the love our lives at just that particular moment? Do we plan on having that car wreck on that particular day? Life throws us curveballs all of the time. It’s our job to catch those balls and run with them.
If you are weighed down by too many bills and too many responsibilities you run the risk of dropping those balls.
I am not saying that you shouldn’t have a stable life. Ap0k has worked for the same company for almost 20 years. I would consider that pretty stable. If he were to suddenly want to change careers it would be scary, but I would support him 100%, just as he supported me quitting my job. My stability comes from knowing that Ap0k will always be here with me no matter what happens.
Don’t stress over the future. The future is going to happen no matter what you do today. Why give yourself ulcers or risk a possible heart attack? Let the beauty of life unfold in front of you and see each day as a new adventure. Life is precious and you shouldn’t waste it by worrying and planning yourself to death.
Sunday, June 05, 2005
We get the point!
You think we need more water in our aquifer don’t you? Well I guess on that count I can agree with you. You sure have made this a dreary week. It’s been hard to plan anything when you have made it rain off and on all day every day this week. Every time I think it’s safe to mow the lawn, WHOOSH, here comes the rain again.
Thank goodness the county came and cleaned out our drains! In the past every time you did this to us we had to float out of the neighborhood. In fact I will never forget the time you watered us so much that the local news channel sent a reporter and camera man into the neighborhood to take footage of the flooding. Usually you only flood us when you toss a hurricane our way. Oh, do you remember the time you teased us with Hurricane Elena in 1985? Now THAT was a lot of water! But as bad as that was, it wasn’t near as bad as The No-Name Storm you snuck in on us in 1993. You scared the daylights out of us with that one! I am thankful that our house is at the front end of our neighborhood though. I have always wondered if you have something against the people that live in the back. After the No-Name Storm, Ap0k was lucky enough to have a big old pick-up truck. He spent quite a bit of time pulling people’s cars out of the water. I do remember him stalling the truck out once though. Mother Nature, do have any idea how hard it is to push a ’66 Chevy pick-up through a flood?
After last season’s hurricane season, I am terrified of what you are going to do to Florida this year. Last year I started working the cleanup after Hurricane Charley. Before we could even make a dent in the mess you tossed Hurricane Frances at us. Just when we thought things couldn’t get any worse you decided that Hurricane Ivan needed to pay us a visit. Mother Nature, was it REALLY necessary to send Hurricane Jeanne here too? Do you realize the destruction you caused? Do you realize how many lives you destroyed?
I bet that after 4.5 billion years of tending to our weather you are probably becoming bored with your job. I hope you know how much we appreciate everything that you do for us. Even though you send us bad weather now and then, for the most part you give us just the right amount of rain and sunshine that we need. I wouldn’t want your job for all the money in the world!
Saturday, June 04, 2005
This is 2005, not 1985. Don’t you realize how many women watch porn these days?
We girls are tired of looking at the same old guys who are stuck in the 80’s. We want some quality men in our porn! The days of hair bands are long gone. Don’t you realize how stupid you look with your long hair all up in a pony tail? Get it cut! And what’s with the 80’s gigolo look (Herschel Savage)? All that does is make me laugh.
We also want some younger men. It’s all well and good that you put 19 year old girls with 40 year old men, but why can’t you go the other way too? Yes, you are getting a bit better at the MILF videos, but even those are usually with older men. We want some hot 19 year old guys! We are tired of seeing guys who are old enough to be our parents. I am almost 40 and Randy West is the same age as my mother and has been a porn actor since the 70’s! Randy, take a cue from some of the other guys. Give it up and just direct.
The quality of the men in porn in general is low. Half of them look gay and the other half needs some kind of maintenance. Gay guys are fine, but when I want to see gay guys in porn I will watch a gay video (which I do tend to watch quite frequently I might add.) When I watch straight porn I want to see a straight looking guy! Take Peter North for example. Dude, we know you are gay! I have the video so you can’t lie to me! I saw you all bent over that desk getting it from the rear. It was a nice video yes, but you aren’t fooling me with the so-called straight stuff.
Every day I see more and more new girls in porn, yet the guys tend to be the same ones over and over again. That gets pretty boring. Tom Byron has been in 2068 movies (movies, not just scenes.) I think that’s enough now! It’s time to move on.
Also, I have to say that some of these actors are totally out of shape and butt ass ugly! Nothing turns me off more than to see some flabby old dude trying to act the stud. Ron Jeremy, I love you to death as a person, but would I have sex with you? I really doubt it!
Don’t even get me started on Max Hardcore! I can get past the violence in your movies because I understand it a fantasy based business, but damn man, can’t you just go away? There is absolutely nothing even remotely sexually attractive about you! You remind me of some drunken old redneck guy you’d find in a country bar on any week night.
Sean Michaels and Marc Davis have always been two of my favorite porn actors, but with almost 2200 movies between the two of them, even they are starting to wear thin on me.
What is one of the most used drugs in the porn industry today? Cocaine? Nope. It’s Viagra! If that doesn’t tell you something is wrong then nothing will.
Bring on the young good lookin’ guys!!!!!!
Don't forget that women have money too, and we would probably spend more if you would put higher quality men in your products.
Friday, June 03, 2005
One new album they mentioned specifically was Motown Remixed. Well of course I immediately went to Amazon to check the track list. Once I saw the list of songs I went right to easynews and downloaded the cd. With some of the songs I have posted and some of the comments I’ve made here, you know I am a sucker for the Motown style of music.
Ap0k and I listened to the cd during dinner that night and the following is our review:
01. Jackson 5 - I Want You Back (Z-Trip Remix)
The most striking difference in this track is the strengthening of the bass and drum lines. I have always thought this song had a hollow sound. In all honesty I have never cared much for the Jackson 5 mainly because I am not a fan of child singers. This remix seems to give the song more depth. Ap0k likes pretty much anything by the Jackson 5. He thought this one was well done.
02. Gladys Knight & The Pips - Heard It Through The Grapevine
(Sympathy For The Grapes Mix)
This was a great song to begin with. The backing track on this one makes it a much peppier track, though I wish the crash cymbal had been a little less tinny sounding. Ap0k seemed to like this one too.
03. Marvin Gaye - Let's Get It On (Da Producers MPG Groove Mix)
Making a good remix of a slow song is a tricky thing. While we both liked this version, I personally think that it lost some of the “sex” that the original had.
04. Stevie Wonder - Signed, Sealed, Delivered I'm Yours (DJ Smash Essential Funk Mix)
All I can say about this one is that while it has been changed, it could have been the original. Excellent.
05. Jackson 5 - ABC (Saleem Remix Krunk-A-Delic Party Mix)
*sigh* Another Jackson 5 song. I can’t stand the original song. The background track makes it barely listenable. Ap0k liked this one also. (He has no taste!)
06. Rare Earth - I Just Want To Celebrate (Mocean Worker Remix)
I am a huge fan of the original song so I was terrified that they might have screwed it up. Boy was I shocked! I think this is quite possibly the best remixed song I have ever heard! In fact I think this may be the next song I will post. Ap0k really liked this one also. We ended up playing this one multiple times.
07. The Temptations - Papa Was A Rollin' Stone (DJ Jazzy Jeff & Pete Kuzma Solefull Remix)
I am going to quote Ap0k on this one. “Sacrilege! Some songs were perfect when they were originally made and should never be screwed with!” Can you tell this is one of his favorite songs? While I admit that the original is a MUCH better song, this remix is quite good. The backing track stays as smooth as the original so it isn’t too jarring of a difference. The clapping gets a bit annoying though.
08. Smokey Robinson - Quiet Storm (Groove Boutique Remix)
I have always thought that this was one of the most boring songs ever made. And you know what? I still do! We didn’t even make it through this whole track before we changed it.
09. Diana Ross & The Supremes - My World Is Empty Without You (Tranzition Remix)
With all of the songs that Motown has available why on earth would they pick this one? Another snoozer. The backing track does make it a little more lively, but still zzzzzz.
10. The Temptations - Just My Imagination (Running Away With Me) (Easy Mo Bee Remix)
Why did they group all of the slow songs together? This is getting boring! The Temptations released a gazillion songs. They should have picked a better one. The only real change is a dull drum line. Blah.
11. The Undisputed Truth - Smiling Faces Sometimes (Futureshock Main Ingredient Mix)
Yay! Finally we get to another good song! Still slow, but at least it’s one that I like. This also could have been the original. Songs like this need to keep the original flavor and this is a good example of that. I hate it when they make meaningful songs “dancy” if you know what I mean. Ap0k agreed with me on this one too.
12. Smokey Robinson & The Miracles - The Tears Of A Clown (Hotsnax Remix)
Now I just said I didn’t like it when they made songs “dancy” and along comes this song. They made this one a total dance song and I love it!!!! They totally improved this song from one end to the other. Ap0k said he could here this one playing in a club with no problem.
13. Eddie Kendricks - Keep On Truckin' (DJ Spinna Remix)
Once again this could have been the original. Very well done. The original is not a favorite of either of us, but we both liked this version.
14. Edwin Starr - War (King Britt Remix)
This one is tricky. The song was originally a protest song meant to be taken seriously. This remix, while very well done musically, takes the feeling out of the song. The passion doesn’t seem as strong as the original.
15. Rick James - Mary Jane (DJ Green Lantern Evil Genius Remix)
Nothing surprising here really. This song has been remixed by everyone and his brother I think. This version is very well done though.
Our overall rating:
Though Ap0k just said that “Papa Was A Rolling Stone” deserves a D- at best.
As the best song on the album, I give "I Just Want To Celebrate" an A+
My only real complaint with the whole album is that with the large amount of Motown artists available to work with, why did they repeat so many of them?
Thursday, June 02, 2005
We have tried to be the best parents we could, but now it’s time to swim on your own. We had a nice little bank account going, but over the last 6 months you two have managed to drain it almost dry. One of you is 19, the other is 21. I think you should be able to take care of yourselves at least a little bit.
Of course we will never let either of you starve. Our kitchen is open 24 hours a day. We will also never let you sleep on the street. The couch is always there for either of you.
Try to remember that Ap0k is only one person with one job. It’s hard for him to cover everything for every one. He’s covered rent and he’s covered utilities. He’s bought your groceries and your clothes. He’s bought one of you a car. He’s bought you furniture. Now today he paid off one of your boyfriend’s cars so it wouldn’t be repossessed. All he ever asks for in return is to be treated like a human. A simple thank you goes a long way. Unfortunately those are few and far between, especially from the boyfriend. You know he will do anything for you, but the handing over of money has to stop. I am sitting here in a half remodeled house. I am missing half of my drywall. Now that I have no money left it will have to stay like this even longer. Sure, we could put it on the credit cards, but we would still have to pay for it. That’s why we had saved all of that money up.
It’s time for you both to get jobs, and keep them. I know that sometimes jobs suck, but you can’t keep quitting them when you don’t have another lined up.
You know we love you both to death and we will continue to do whatever we can to HELP you, unfortunately we can’t keep doing EVERYTHING for you.
We love you both.
Wednesday, June 01, 2005
*Why can’t I get over my fear of lightning?
*Why can’t American Idol start a new season the minute the old one is up? OK, I know the answer to this one, but darn it, I had nothing to watch last night. I miss my Bo!
*Why do so many actresses think they have to be bone thin to the point of anorexia? In “real life” men seem to like women who actually look like they eat once in awhile.
*I found out today that Benjamin Moore has 260 paint colors available in 2oz. jars. Each jar covers a 2’x2’ square area. That is going to help me A LOT in picking my wall colors!
*I repeat, why can’t I get over my fear of lightning? I really wish it would stop!
*Ap0k has to be at work at 4am. With the way it’s raining I think he may have to take my truck just to get out of the neighborhood. Camaros and floods do not a pretty pair make. Plus the fact that my tires are much better than his. He keeps putting off buying new ones until he decided on which new wheels he wants. If he doesn’t make a choice soon I may have to make it for him or he will be driving on bare wheels.
*May went out with a roar and June followed right behind. It poured buckets Monday into Tuesday, and then rained off and on all day Tuesday, sometimes HARD. Here it is Tuesday into Wednesday and it’s doing it all over again. Tuesday morning was so bad that part of the interstate was shut down due to flooding. It’s not really even the rainy season yet.
*What would you do if you saw your neighbors having sex in their front yard? Would you watch? Would you run and hide? Would you yell at them? Would you call the police? I asked Ap0k this question yesterday. Personally I think I would watch (depending on which neighbors it was!), but Ap0k says there are too many kids around here so he would call the police.
*If you knew a close friend or family member had committed a crime would you turn them over to the police? What if it were a minor crime such as shoplifting. How about something like arson? Maybe a white collar crime like embezzlement? Would you turn them over if they stole a car? What if they had killed someone in a hit and run? What if you found out they had intentionally murdered someone? I think these are probably easy choices to make until you are actually faced with them for real.
*If you went to get $20 out of the ATM and it spit out $2,000; would you keep the money or would you take it to the bank and return it? I have had it give me a $50 instead of a $20 before and I kept that, but I think if it gave me too much extra I would probably return it. I am too much of a chicken to keep it. I just know that somehow the ATM would tell them it was ME that got the money. Though if my receipt said $20, how could they prove I got the money?
*As you can see, I wasn’t able to keep a solid thought going while I was writing this. Damn this lightning!